Artwork

What Went Wrong With… E! Entertainment & The E! Network?

An image with white text - SHITE - with the final E as the logo of E Entertainment and E! News. The word SHITE is a British colloquialism for shit, as in bad quality

Celebrity worship and Reality Television are diseases of this century for which we have yet to find a cure. Since the turn of the millennium, becoming a star has become as straight forward as heating a microwave meal, and like a TV dinner; Reality TV is a tasteless offering filled with cheap ingredients. We have now reached a point when talent is no longer a pre-requisite for celebrity; these days any bland-looking hack can gain praise at the drop of a talent-show hat.

E! Entertainment, which began as one of the catalysts to this Non-Celebrity explosion, has slowly become a creator of, and a hype-man to, a culture of vacuous Pap-hungry pap-smears. Shows like the Kardashians, in which a gaggle of over-privileged nobodies do absolutely nothing; prove how little one has to do in order to make it onto this pointless channel.

On E! there are also shows such as Chelsea Lately in which what looks like a blonde middle-aged burns victim televises her failed attempts at comedy, all the while spewing out casual racism to a panel of boot-licking arse-kissers. Then there is the Fashion Police; where a coven of witches, preside over images of celebrities and give their unqualified opinion. God only knows why a rickety old plastic-has-been, a bean-pole presenter, a pudgy-faced offspring of a talentless Rocker, and usually a token gay guy with no socks; were chosen to be experts of fashion, especially when they themselves are draped in some of the most awful and hideous creations known to gay men.

Finally to round up this line-up of shitsters, there is Terrence “BET Sellout” Jenkins and Giuliana “I survived Cancer” Rancic perpetually standing and grinning as they run through the day’s so-called “celebrity news” in a manner only fit for groupies. In reality, no “news” is ever reported; instead a list of fashion labels and a rundown of star-sightings is read out, in sentences filled with Hollywood abbreviations and out-of-date acronyms such as Photogs, BF, and OMG. E! News is a programme which claims to be entertainment news, but there are more references to labels and brands than actual entertainment bulletins. So concerned is this show with name-dropping designers and designer labels, that the presenters disgorge copious amounts of fashion-factoids at every opportunity; even when the story has nothing to do with style. It’s getting to the point that, if a real story breaks, I wouldn’t be surprised if they said something like…

“…The reality TV Star was brutally raped and killed earlier today. Her lifeless body was found in a stunning Vera Wang dress and Christian Louboutin heals that were so TTDF; they were like, totally to die for…”

The entire channel’s schedule is filled with Showbiz white-noise, and each show’s line-up is made from the most sycophantic presenters ever to grace our screens. The end result is a channel jam-packed with the shittiest of shit. All the flotsam and jetsam from some kind of noughties entertainment shipwreck, it seems has gathered on the shore of this horrid channel, and has since congealed to create an island of non-entertainment now residing in a putrid bubble of fanatic grovellers and celebrity adulators.

Hopefully this bubble filled with fakes and flunkies will soon burst, along with E!

That would be the real Pop of Culture.

6 replies »

  1. News should have always been just news, even when it’s propaganda from the government. Shit like the E Channel should not even exist, but that’s where we are today. Kim Kardashian’s ass is more important than actual news. We are to the point where at least 70% (I’m willing to say 90%) of what we call “news” is just sports and celebrity drooling. Who gives a flying fuck about these things? Obviously Americans do cause there has yet to be an outrage over it. E Channel gave them reality shows, and like the blessed obedient sheep they are, they watched it and helped them make cash cows off the garbage. Now today scripted reality shows are an endless pit of narcissism and people must enjoy it cause they do watch it, and as for the narcissistic no talent stars and celebrities created out of these shows, they are the role models for today’s youth since MTV came up with the idea to market it towards teenagers.

    I ditched my TV last year, and stopped watching sports and I feel LIBERATED ever since. If only the rest of America would do the same, and show some outrage, we could make a difference. Though sadly, I think the 70’s movie “Network” predicted everything accurately as it has passed.

    • I think they realised a long time ago that if a handful of corporations, or eventually one corporation, controls the supply and demand of products through the guise of entertainment; they could pretty much control the world. Like Ned Beatty’s character said in Network, there are no nations, no individuals, only corporations. The world we see through our TV and slowly through mainstream Internet, is a fake controlled construct in order to sell people products and keep them satisfied with their dull and pointless lives. Channels like E! keep people thinking that celebrity and fashion are important factors in their life, and that working their jobs in order to attain celebrity plugged products, is the be all and end all of human life. The entire social, economic, political, and entertainment construct from school, to work, to retirement, to death; is controlled by corporations to perpetually make money and profit. People need to realise that we are slaves.

  2. Reality TV is cancer but it is our fault. We bought into the trash. We made them famous. We made it all possible. We got no one to blame but ourselves.

  3. The Truman Show was definitely ahead of its time. The movie definitely predicted reality TV. Is it a coincidence that one year after the movie was released, Big Brother started airing? We should have listened to Peter Weir, instead we threw our brains in the bin and made shite like Big Brother popular. What a result! Thank you society for popularising crap which dumbs down millions of people. The 2000s was not a great decade because it was filled with a lot of reality tv crap from X Factor to Don’t Tell The Bride.
    Whatwentwrongwith, you could write an article about Big Brother or Reality TV in general. In my opinion, Big Brother started the trend of reality TV in the UK and ruined prime time TV. Big Brother made possible for a bunch of nobodies to become celebrities. We wouldn’t have Geordie shore or the valleys if it wasn’t for Big Brother. I really wish Channel 5 would cancel the show, but that would not happen because millions watch the show and it is extensively covered by news publications and tabloids. Seriously, who really wants to watch other people live? Who the fuck cares?

What Went Wrong Or Right With This Article? (spam & shite will be deleted)

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.